Saturday, April 28, 2012

Too thankful.

Ah, how much do I love showering. XD (I am a shower freak for a reason) Apparently it makes me feel better, heat treatment probably since I take really hot showers. But if you ask me what stop me from showering then these other times?

The facts that holding the shower hose and blowing my hair make my arm muscles scream in ache. Haha. Surprised, are you? If there's one thing hardworking in me, that would be those neurotransmitters and receptors involved in pain. Haha.

Um.. I know all these babblingss have no connection with the title. (I can't think. I had too much revisions) Haha.

Okay, I pray in showers (well, I thought it's cool. you cant talk in a shower with anybody else since I havent seen any waterproof phones, so God gets the special treat). UMm. I know. XD

So, I was praying and I am too thankful. Because, this period (exam preparation) last year, I was..
1. taking 8 paracetamols everyday (codeines on super-bad day)
2. drinking cups and cups of coffee to stay awake (since I cant sleep at night and I cant stay awake during daytime)
3. working two days a week (which is enough to wear me out)
4. hardly sleep well at night (it's normal for me though)
5. stressed out to the max and super unprepared for the exam. 

And, this year.. I am..
1. not having the chance to take 8 paracetamol for a day yet. (though I had to take some occasionally)
2. taking this SNRI (complicated as it sounds) which makes the pain more bearable in some sense
3. drinking NO COFFEE (it makes my condition worse)
4. NOT WORKING! (and that's why I could be writing this on a saturday night)
5. sleeping really well lately (though I never feel rested but at least I am not awake!)
6. not too stressed because I HAVE GROWN! and I have Mr Man to share. 
7. on quite a good track for my progress.
8. having Mr.Man to shout at me when I ask me if I would fail. Haha. 

Too thankful. What more can I ask? If you ask me, if my conditions get better this year? I might have to disappoint you by telling you that, no, but it got worse. To get up from the bed each morning, I have to wrestle, pray and bear that really bad aching, pain, stiffness. My shoulders and my back ache sitting down whole day revising. My hands ache from writing and cooking my survival meals. The pain never leave me, but I learn not to focus on these pains, but to focus on how God bless me and help me with these pains. Looking back, I can only be too thankful for His faithfulness. He never left me nor forsake me but He is giving me more and more blessings each day.

This morning,
Me: I am still stuck in bed. 
Mr. Man: New day New you?
Me: =)

Yes, His grace is renewed every morning. I am more than convinced. 

Sorry for being quite random really. Ops. *back to studies* :( 

Thursday, April 26, 2012

You make me smile :)

It's been few lousy days. But I am pressing on!

I rang him in the midst of revision. And after that I told him, "I am having a headache, but after hearing your voice, I am still having a headache" [rephrased though] haha.

But i smiled =).

And that's what all matters.

I miss the massaging part ONLY XD 

Monday, April 23, 2012

Unsettled


It's that season of life again, exams. I am never an exam person. I get all sorts of reactions, you name it, I have it. haha. So yea, I really dislike Chemistry and I love other subjects. I enjoy studying other subjects but not Chemistry. It just makes me wonder why did I even chose pharmacy at the first place. Well well.... 

Life achievements, are not meant to be hold on unto. Because all these shall pass, one day. So failures are not meant to bring you down as well. Because they shall pass as well, one day. So, what's such a big deal to fail an exam? It's nothing. I grew up believing that there should be no failure in life, until my brother and Esmond told me that it's fine to fail. Tell me why not? Tell me why cant one fail? 

Why am I even unsettled over such a small earthly thing? Is my God too small that I need to worry about all these things in life? It's just part of life, to be enjoyed. Good and bad times are there for a reason. 

And, His strength is made perfect in my weaknesses.


This song moved me. I am more than flesh and bones, and I am beautiful. I want to believe that I am someone worth dying for. :)

Friday, April 20, 2012

This, too shall pass

Devotion today reminds me again that whatever it is, it shall pass, one day, because everything now is just temporary. The goal is that eternal joy and we shall press on. No matter how bad you feel today, dont worry, they shall pass. You know it, so believe it. The pain also, shall pass. :)

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Multiple posts in one.

Too many good things happened in these few weeks and it would be a shame if I dont record them down.


The best weekend of life
Haha, yes. It was the best. A friday outing with the closed ones in Durham, plainly enjoying the sun, and it ended with an early birthday surprise!!! everyone took a bus down to durham just to surprise me at the restaurant during dinner time. I was so touched, so pampered, feeling so blessed. and not to forget, the prezzies I got made me smile like a kid!!! That Saturday was my last day at work, of course, it had been a long waited day. But, guess what, I was reluctant, telling the few methadone patients that I am leaving, having them say goodbye and wish me luck was again a whole new experience. These people might be the people the society dislikes, but I am sure if you love them like any person in life, they love you back. Michelle, my supervisor came in with a bunch of flowers, a card and a photo frame with everyone in the picture. She had been the best supervisor really, I am more than blessed to have her, always so kind to swap my shifts whenever I cant make them. And, what else, two of my colleagues appeared with a cake and pizza hut deliveries!!! It came so unexpectedly, so touched and really feeling so blessed to have met these awesome people in life.And Sunday, Candy and I had a really good session of sharing about lives, issues, blessings in that 3 hours long bus ride to Manchester. Those times were always cherished. And to end this weekend up, my man was standing there welcoming with a hug at the arrival hall in Memmingen. To meet up finally was such a new experience, I could only be thankful for such a thing to happen. 

The surprise party, 30th March 2012
The card and prezie from Michelle and the flowers at the back :)

Safina baked me that gorgeous cake, and thats me in uniform for the last time !
Travelling
The journey started with a missed train! Haha. New train and bus tickets had to be bought again. (Not that cheap really XD) Though it was not the best thing to happen and it was definitely a lesson learnt. And, I am just thankful of the attitude we both had when it happened. We knew we both contributed to being late and there was no point blaming and guess what, it did not affect us that much as we would expected. PTL! It was a rainy 3 days 2 nite trip in Prague!! But fret not, we did enjoy the rain, the total different experience. We enjoyed the cheap food, the unending laughs (My man is super lame, I am sure you agree if you ever get to know him), beautiful buildings, a special bread and the best was just plainly spending time together. And, the journey followed by meeting up with another few friends of mine in Munich. Another 2 days of fun and laugh. And what not, SNOW in SPRING! imagine having snow on blooming flowers. How beautiful could that be. More laughs, fellowships and of course beer sessions in Germany! Haha. Travelling with people you love is always the best thing. The most magnificent view was the one at Neuschwanstein castle I would say. God had been great, everyone was fit and well despite the bad weather and we all really had fun! It was the most relaxing trip ever because I could be all dependant on Mr man with everything, I only need to "carry" myself. Haha. Nothing more. How thankful. To travel during easter was not usual because normally I would be in the church on easter to celebrate His resurrection. But I have learnt that we can celebrate it wherever and whenever we are because we know that He truly lives that today we can be so free and joyful.



On our way back from Prague. :D

On the mountains, Germany

My 22nd Birthday
It all started with a dinner treat at a mexican restaurant from Mr man the night before. To be honest, least expectation I had out of him because he is not that kind of a romantic person but I was wrong!..That midnight, I fell asleep before 12. Waking up to a room full of peach scented candles and romantic songs wad surprising! And he actually decorated me a cakey! I was smiling in his embrace because I know he made that all happened just because of me, a person who never fail to be touched at surprises. He could never understand, but he did it anwyays. haha. And the next day was even more cool! He had a quest for me when he was out to town! making me running around looking for my prezzies! This is so not him! Of course, I am more than happy to find myself a birthday card from dad n mom and a polaroid camera from him, but you know what it was the efforts he made that made me smile. The efforts that I appreciate. And I got a postcard sent from a bloved friend all the way to Germany!!! Was ultra super happy! It was all great, with all the wishes and messages from all over the world :D Thanks for everything all you people who makes my life all that wonderful" And I know the ultimate one I have to thank is my Father Lord in heaven. 

The quest started with the note this miniature Mr man held. 
The rest of my time spent in Aalen, where Mr man lives was awesome. It was just a small quiet town. Meeting up with his friends, his church community and plainly understanding his daily routines were generally a wonderful experience. Having to cook for him and waiting him come back from class while I do my revisions for the coming exam were all simply a joy. The stroll in the evening, the time spent cooking together, praying together, watching movies and getting to know each other more were all much cherished. We grow to know each other more and more throughout the time spent together, good and bad things of course. Love is not blind, trust me, but it helps you accept each other for who we are. Being pampered of course was still the best thing ever. God, has been too good, too good blessing me with such a good mature man. I could only pray that He allows the journey to continue till we are united finally one day in the church. And my pain intensity decreases so much, believe it or not, with him aside :). PTL!

To sum it all up, too many blessings make me wonder how could one be not appreciative with God's grace.